Loading ...Know Your Partner – A thought on compatibility
Sometimes the problem that can occur with couples is that they fall in love with the idea of marriage, and not necessarily with the person they are going to actually marry. This common failure can lead a person to ignore certain traits in their partner, or even assign desired traits. Eventually this leads to high expectations that can never be met. Maybe it’s not romantic, but in the end, love isn’t enough. A strong current of compatibility needs to run between the two people.
This thoughtful essay had this to say:
One happily-wed Rice University graduate told me: “Marriage can work. You just have to have a good understanding of one another.” I think that is the best advice I have yet received. I’d just like to add, though, that once you have that understanding of one another, you have to use that understanding to make the other person happy. Because people can understand each other and still be cruel to one another.
After hearing reasons for failed relationships as well as for successful ones, I have come to the following conclusion: marriage is like a business relationship with your best friend. Having fun and confiding in each other is key, but you also need to make sure you are compatible on a variety of levels – religion, family values, career. Then, see if you can really live together – all those annoying habits and pet peeves included. If your goals for the future don’t match, then how can you expect to stay together for a life time?